Kaizen Chaos

Though I’ve pretty much come to terms with the undeniable fate of my failing marriage I was still a little stunned when someone said “You know, this could be all over in a couple months.” Huh. How do you like that?

I pictured myself there flipping through to the back page of some legal form searching for the dotted line where I will literally sign my life away. It could be that easy. I wonder who will be the first to sign? Would he even hesitate for a brief moment? I can see myself looking down at his signature, calm and collected simply waiting for mine to join it for the last time. A few quick swipes of a pen and I’d could be single again.

I remember when I first got married it took awhile to sink in. I’d repeat stupid stuff in my head over and over to convince myself “I’m married. I have a husband. I’m his wife, I’m Mrs. Somebody.” Smiling and giggling I wiggled my hand watching my dazzling diamonds sparkle, mesmerized by the ignorant bliss marriage brings.

What a joke. I tossed the now meaningless bands into a box weeks ago. Soon I’m going to be somebody’s ex-wife. I’m Ms. Attitude (aka SuperBitch) with a soon-to-be-ex-husband. How does one happily flaunt the disgusting transition of divorce? Perhaps I will get a new tattoo and I will wear the t-shirt Turtle gave me that reads “Boys Don’t Last…Tattoos Do.” 

Hmm. I’m also strongly considering choosing a brand NEW last name after this is all said and done with. Why the hell not?

Popularity: 11% [?]