Kaizen Chaos

Mr. Wonderful bought a guitar last week and it brought back a few good memories I have of my Dad. For the first time in a very long time I cried because I truly and deeply missed him.

Dad once told me he used to dream of having a family band. When I was little he’d pull out his electric guitar, crank up his gigantic Bose amp and rock out to “Johnny B. Goode” or “Old Time Rock & Roll.” He’d stand my sister and me in front of his silver 50’s style microphone that shocked our lips if we stood too close and try to get us to sing some Patsy Cline or John Prine in his makeshift basement studio. (Apparently he didn’t listen very closely because Patsy Cline I am not!) He’d play for hours and hours, mostly by ear, switching between his electric and acoustic guitars. He wanted to teach me to play but my hands were small and the strings hurt my tender little fingers. He promised with practice they’d callous like his and not hurt anymore. He wanted to teach me what a riff was, how to play a chord, how to use his tuner machine. But I didn’t want to play the guitar. Instead, I wanted to play the drums (and I guess his family band didn’t need a drummer because I never got a set) so I’d humor him for a bit before running off to do something else.

Fast-forward about 20 years…

When Mr. W first held his guitar I thought about how cool it would’ve been to pick it up, play a quick solo and be like, “Yeah, my Dad taught me that a long time ago.” In the past few days I’ve come to realize how much I admire that part of my estranged father and how much I regret passing on the opportunity for him to share that time and knowledge with me. I wonder if I had sat down with him years ago if things would be any different today. Would our past troubles have been easier to swallow, or would our time apart be even tougher? All differences aside, I can’t help but think of what a great time the three of us would have together, and I know my Dad would love nothing more.

:::sigh:::
What I wouldn’t give right now to have a few hours with my Dad and his guitar.

“And Daddy won’t you take me back to Muhlenberg County,
down by the Green River where Paradise lay.
Well I’m sorry my son but you’re too late in asking…”

Popularity: 8% [?]